The Up-Side of Hypochondria


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I suspect I may have hypochondria, to a small degree at least; my husband is inclined to agree. Fibromyalgia is a disorder that's definitely not a figment of my imagination, but the colourful spectrum of symptoms it inflicts upon me has undoubtedly messed with my mind. When I had intense pain and tingling along my spine three years ago, I was convinced I had meningitis. When my stomach was overcome with stabbing pains I just knew I had cancer. When my joints became excessively achy and more difficult to move I feared I had Multiple Sclerosis. When a birthmark's tint or definition alters, there's no doubt in my mind that it's melanoma. Fibro can cause my arms, fingers, and toes to lose their feeling, and at times I've suspected diabetes. My shoulder has been bothering me constantly for the last few days, and what's my first conclusion? Cancer. Why? Because as in most other cases my fear is based on a story I heard about someone who had the very same symptoms and did in fact fall victim to the deadly disease.

I don't enjoy fearing the worst, but with all the teasing I've gotten from my dear hubby I realized, Hey, hypochondria's not so bad! And here's why:

If you're a hypochondriac...
- you believe junk food is only going to accelerate your cancer, so you're more likely to make healthy food choices.
- you'll take very well to running, because fitness and good health will help you outrun heart disease.
- the doctor's office and health food store know you by name.
- you won't ever be like those people who stubbornly refuse to see the doctor out of pride or awkwardness; no, you're on the phone at the slightest twinge - diabetes will not get the best of you!
- you'd rather stay indoors and blog than hang out at melanoma heights the beach.
- when you die your epitaph will read: I was right.

So, is the list missing something? Let me know!

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