Love & Marriage

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"An observer can see that nothing is started with such high hopes and shining expectations, yet fails as regularly as romantic love in marriage... But why does love so often fail? Surely it is because the 'lovers' have no clear understanding of what love is and is not; they do not know how to love; and in many cases they have never made the commitment to love," (Wheat, 1980, p. 46).

Dr. Wheat's message is that the kind of love explained in the Bible - the kind of love lived out by Christ while he was on earth - has turned his marriage, and the marriages of many other couples right-side up. Relationships that were once dead and on the brink of divorce have found renewed life and a deeper love than they had ever experienced. Below are some Biblical truths about real love that can breathe life back into a marriage, dating relationship, or any kind of relationship for that matter:

Love Understood
Real love is not mysterious or irrational
☼ I can understand what love is through the word of God

Real love is not an uncontrollable feeling
☼ Love is an active power to be controlled by the will

Love is not a simple, easy doing what comes naturally
☼ Love is always a choice backed up by action
☼ Love is costly even when the giving is pure joy

Love Empowered
☼ I can choose to love
☼ I can learn the art of loving

Love Acquired
Real love is not produced by trying to attract it
☼ I can produce love by giving it first and giving it wisely

Love in Action
☼ Love recognizes a unique value in the beloved
☼ Love chooses to affirm the value of the beloved always
☼ Love consistently does the best for the beloved


Wheat, E. & Okes Perkins, G. (1980). Love life for every married couple: How to fall in love, stay in love, rekindle your love. Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan.